Lets raise our daughters strong

I always said that if I had a daughter, I’d raise her strong. I think that’s the aim for most. But when it comes down to it – it’s hard to figure out exactly how to do that. I watched the film Moana last night before falling asleep and it’s a film that I can’t stop thinking about. It’s the kind of film I want Daisy watching. It’s not focused on prince charming, it’s focused on the strong independency of Moana. She’s an explorer; an adventurer with soul and fire in her heart. We need more films like that – films that focus on strong minds. I think the best way  to raise strong daughters is to set an example. It’s so easy to be a child and have no worries, to be free and wild and crazy. As you get older life kind of gets in the way. It’s not as easy to be who you want to be. You have to work hard to get there. You have to pay bills, run a household, be an adult.

Beautiful

I try not to talk about other people’s looks too much. I want Daisy to know that being beautiful stems from how thoughtful and kind you are. It stems from what is inside. If you have beautiful heart, then you’ll shine from the outside. I talk about ugly behaviours or ugly words. It’s so easy to say “Oh my goodness Daisy, you look beautiful” as she tries on her princess dress. But instead I say how amazing she looks and ask what adventures she’s going to get up to. I don’t want her to worry when she’s older – I don’t want her to worry about how she looks or how other girls look. I don’t want her looking at another girl and wishing she had the same hair. I don’t want her feeling unhappy if her teeth aren’t completely straight or her hair won’t sit right.

Smart

I remember in school it felt as though the smart kids where the ones that are more likely to get bullied. I remember that girls played down their intelligence to seem ‘cooler’. Our daughters shouldn’t have to worry about their strengths. They should take pride in their capabilities and relish in working on their weakness. I take interest in everything Daisy does – if she shows interest in cooking dinner then I’ll phrase her and encourage her. If she takes interest in football – I do the exact same. Whatever her passions, I’m behind her 100%.

Confident

Portray confidence and confidence is felt. confidence gets you far and it’s one thing in life that I truly lack. Since Daisy has been born though, I’ve been putting on a front and I feel it’s really helped. Not only that but Daisy will mimic my confidence. I do things now that I would never have done years ago. I used to be too nervous to drive – I now couldn’t imagine my life without a car (lame, huh!) I’m not scared to talk to strangers – I smile when people walk past (even though I very rarely get a smile back!). I think if you portray yourself as confident, especially whilst  in your daughter’s company, then your actions and behaviours will reflect on their own personality.

Adventurous

Daisy may grown up to be a very homely person. She may grow up to enjoy adventure. But either way I want her to know that if jumping out of an aeroplane is her thing, then she can do it. If she wants to dive with sharks (gulp) then she can do just that. If she wants to go skiing, climb mountains, go scuba diving – then she can. She really, really can. If her adventure lay in something less crazy – then that’s okay too. It’s all okay. Whatever she wants to do, as long as her heart and her mind lay at the forefront then I’ll be there supporting her 100%.  I’ll never tell her to stop living in a dream world. Because all the best ideas come from dreaming. Just be sure to turn those dreams into reality.

 

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9 Comments

  • The Pramshed says:

    This is a lovely post and I hope that I am portraying the exact same thing to my daughter. It sounds like Daisy is already on the right path. You go girl! Thanks for linking up at #fortheloveofBLOG. Claire x

  • Donna says:

    It sounds to me like Daisy is already well on her way to being strong. You seem to have the right outlook and it’s so refreshing x

  • Sherry says:

    With you all the way on this one and I totally agree how it was at school to be intelligent and bullied because of it therefore playing it down (I was one). Let’s raise our daughters in all of the above ways #TheOrdinaryMoments

  • Musing Mum says:

    I love this post – very considered and completely on-point. I have a young daughter and I’m really conscious that I want her to grow up strong, confident and outside the confines of gender, to know that she can be anyone and do anything. Because of this, I set up the #DressDownFriday campaign, to tackle gender-stereotypes that can sometimes place invisible yet very real limitations on children, especially girls. If you get a sec, do check it out and let me know what you think.

    http://musingmum.co.uk/dressdownfriday/

    Your blog is a real find, look forward to reading more from you. x

    #fortheloveofBLOG

  • http://www.fortheloveofjars.com says:

    I hope our world will allow our daughters to become the strong independent women that we want them to be. I’m not sure we’ve got it quite right yet, I think women at the moment have so much pressure to be everything to everyone that we often end up feeling like we’ve failed if we don’t turn up looking awesome on the school run or if we can’t make that perfect world book day costume because we were working all weekend and until midnight last night. I only hope that our future allows our daughters time – time to be what they want to be. #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Louise | Squished Blueberries says:

    Oh I love this post! My daughters are both confident but they can very easily have their confidence knocked and I feel like I want to protect them from that until they are strong enough to handle it. There’s a social convention that means we often try to silence and squash our strong, confident, outspoken and proud daughters, and I refuse to do it xx

  • Http://littleladiesbigworld.co.uk says:

    I could not agree more I have two daughters and I tell them that their legs aren’t clever when they grow, that their heart is kind and am trying my best to teach them that whoever they are is perfect for them, it’s just a shame society often does the opposite x

  • www.spaceforthebutterflies.com says:

    I’m with you all the way! I think I was very lucky in that I was brought up to believe that there was nothing that I couldn’t do if I put my mind to it so I’ve never felt the need to hold myself back or pretend to be less intelligent and I have every intention that my girls (and boy!) should feel the same way.

  • http://www.ohlittleonesweet.com says:

    I loved reading this- what a beautiful post. I certainly found at school that girls often played down their intelligence which was so sad really- let’s hope our sons and daughters can grow up feeling like they can celebrate their achievements. Beautiful photos too xx

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